awareness

I’m trying to be aware of my thoughts – my motivations and my desires this week. I can see the beginning of a spiral to an exhausted Friday, and I can see my will wavering on a few things… namely eating well and exercising (oh- how I want to make risotto for dinner just one night this week… or even just order a pizza and ignore my weekly menu all together).

It’s just been one of those weeks, you know? One of those weeks where the clean clothes didn’t exactly get folded on Sunday, and there they have stayed… and one of those weeks where the junk mail is teasing me by being everywhere – on the coffee table, on the counter, on the dining room buffet. Suffice it to say that the little things are sort of piling up over here at this household… and I think that means we’re in for a massive cleaning day on Saturday.

As I type this, my forearms are sore from clutching a silk loop that was suspended from the ceiling during my first AIR Fit class tonight (which was harder than anticipated, by the way!), and last night I didn’t go to sleep until almost two hours later than I normally do… which means I’m tired but also a bit jittery, and certainly not ready for bed when I’ve only been home for just over an hour. sigh.

Instead of falling into the domino effect of bad habits, I’m trying very hard to keep on track, and to be aware of the voice inside my head telling me I don’t really need to go to yoga tomorrow morning… (and then talking back to it, because yes, I can go to yoga tomorrow. Even if I have to sit in child’s pose and just breathe for awhile).

… but if we’re being honest, it’s a good thing I don’t have a bottle of wine in the house, because this looks amazing:

style me pretty

In fact, the whole wedding looks so elegant and rustic and gorgeous… I especially love this picture:

So, I think for now, instead of this awful internal push-pull I have going on… I’m going to start counteracting this inner-dialogue with things I can look forward to this weekend… like going to the farmer’s market and buying some freshly cut flowers to pop in tiny jars and vases and scatter throughout the (soon to be clean) house.

We’re past the mid-week point… the weekend is in sight.

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